Step off sticky, fruit-scented, water-based lube contenders, cause I’m about to hype the hell out of this super simple and super effective Pjur Man Basic PersonalGlide lubricant for men.

2023 UPDATE: This product has been discontinued. Check out Pjur Original Bodyglide instead.

Glycerin, who do you think you’re helping with all that gooey reapplication? Using more and more, acting a fool like this is the unlimited fat-free frozen yogurt machine at a salad-only buffet, going back again and again for just a little bit more-- until you're sticky, bloated and you may or may not have chocolate sprinkles stuck to your chin.

Finally, a lube bottle that doesn’t read like a grocery list full of junk food for your junk. I don’t want food. I want lube. Speaking of Pjur brand and watching what you eat--check out Pjur’s ridiculous gender bias with their Fat-Free for Women labeling (consequently the exact same lube ingredients in what should be called Maxx Muscle Builder Pjur Man Basic, by the same tacky product naming standards).

But ya know what’s not tacky at all? Ding, ding, ding, ding! My pink, rhinestone burner phone cover? Merrrp. Wrong. It’s the consistency of this fan-freaking-tastic personal lubricant! That's correct! And here’s why-- it's dermatologist approved, pure medical grade silicone and has no hidden carbs:

Ingredients: Cyclopentasiloxane, Dimethicone, Dimethiconol

This is body-safe, condom-safe lube that can do what I want it to do. Go where I want it to go, with no fear of sugary fungal ramifications, or what feel like searing, red-hot smears of molten magma, or condom breakage or, “Hey, stop reaming me out so good for a minute so I can so find the other lube, the one for anal in the shower.”

Yup. Just a one-handed blot from the Bingo-style dobber, as fellow author so humorously put it ("Can I get an o-69? o-69?") manages to effectively coat the skin, bath-safe sex toy or condom-protected shaft with a thick waterproof layer, even in the shower. If this is going back to basics, slap a sticker on me and call me a lube minimalist.

Seriously though, why experiment with urethra-burning shampoos for male masturbation in the shower when Basic is right here, waiting for your frenzied phallic friction?

I used a sexy slather of this hypoallergenic, condom-safe, silicone-based lube with Crown Skinless Skin condom for some steamy shower action last night and I think the mirror is still foggy today! And yes, the fabulous Skinless condom is also coated in a silicone lubricant, so it’s a double scoop silicone sundae kinda day. Banana split, please!

But, like a whipped dessert, this stuff can be pretty messy, as evidenced by my new Jaegermeister+dildo-shaped-lube-stain-t-shirt I incurred from the events of last night. Be sure to pick up some sex toy cleaner for any adult toy clean up or fabric stains.

Marketed as a for men, daily use, entry-level lube in the Pjur HIS Formulas product line, Pjur Man Basic rates even higher than world-famous Pjur Original BodyGlide in my book. Price-wise, the two are equals as I scored my 100 ml/3.4 oz Basic bottle at the current price of $15.99.

If this is the Basic version, I can’t even imagine how good the ExtremeGlide premium rendition of this Pjur HIS formula must be. But, since we don’t carry it as of right now, inquiring minds and orifices will just have to wait and speculate-- to the EXTREME!

Overall Rating: 5 Stars

Final Verdict:

Basically, Pjur Man Basic PersonalGlide lubricant fits every single one of my safer sex needs-- hand-to-genital masturbation, body-safe vaginal sex with a condom, anal sex with a condom, underwater sex and non-porous sex toy play-- and despite my distinct lack of male equipment, leaves me with no complaints whatsoever. OK, OK, I'll have seconds.